round and round and round/into the breeze

round and round and round i go
where i'll go,
nobody knows
but only in heaven
and i'm here on earth
with my head in a rush
from going round and round and round
wandering throughout my head
i've gotten lost again
it's a dangerous place
and i can't stand
no i can't stand
i have to spin
round and round and round
and never ceasing
always twirling
chaos follows
gets mixed in
throwing paint into the breeze
till it splatters in the air--
i know how to paint with all the colors of the rainbow
i just don't know how to paint them with an aim
my arm is bad at judging where to go when
throwing paint into the breeze--
and now i'm spinning--
the paint is blurring--
my head is pained--
a tornado of color--
i gasp for breath--
it's moving towards me--
and i fall down--
and i can't move--
i can't get up--
i'm lifted up--
my head is spinning--
the colors consume me--
my thoughts consume me--
and now i'm thinking--
and now i know--
that going round and round and round
always catches up somehow
and now i've done it
once again
i've torn myself down with my paints
while throwing thought into the breeze
they mixed and swelled with utter ease
and now they've come full circle here:
they mixed and came out utter fear.

-D.S.B
3/2-3/2014

of dead ends and candles

dead leaves.
dead trees.
all i see
is another dead end
lit by the light of another candle.
what's left to do
but turn around
ask God for help
once again
be washed clean
once again
take a chance
once again
that all will be well
once again
and over and over
it keeps coming back
i'm at the start
just like the past
another candle's lighted wick
burning bright with hope
and so
i follow my new flame
down
down
to the end of the wick
as i wander deeper
down
into the length of another road
all my heart and
all my hopes
burning bright inside a flame
this one may just be eternal
and'll lead me to myself
at last

and then it goes out.

just like the rest.
i've hit a dead end.
once again.
i'm surrounded.
dead leaves.
dead trees.
all i know's
there's another dead end
and i need another candle.

-D.B.
2/4/2014

cookie cutter series: part 1

i was not formed
like the cookie cutter shapes
that you try to fit me into
in the world you call reality
i'm not so cut and dry
made with a straight-edged knive
jagged blunt and rusty
is more descriptive of the style
a cloud with pale blue lining
soft and soothing from the looks
it lines a mounting plume
of insurmountable despair
pairing drops of deep compassion
with temporal hidden grief
and a lesser known oration
of injustice-fueled rage
that builds in rolling fashion
making mockeries of your shapes
weaving tales of desperation
through the tales of pure deceit
wound around desire for 'freedom'
brought about by non-belief
in the Maker who released us
from our own eternal grief

-D.B.
1/17/2013

a bird is flying

tree to tree

she'll never stay long

but she'll never be free.

-D.B.
12/12-13/2013

orchestra of the heart: turning

can you hear my heart turn
as it palpates to the beat
of a song so sweet
but steeped in the past?
it draws on the strings
of my heart and mind
makes me yearn for the times
when i first heard their sounds.
i move to the rhythm
and sing off the beat
while the songs just repeat
and i'm lost in the music
i'm lost in the music
and song after song
i yearn for what's gone
and forget what i have.
forget my new song
forget naught but
a song so sweet
that draws at the strings
breaking the seams
steeping my mind
in the times of the past
sweet song after song just
moving to the rhythm
palpating to the beat
and my heart turns again
my heart turns again...

-D.B.
12/12/2013

words

my thoughts are mine
as such
my words are mine
they form
inside my head
they brew
a storm
of pure emotion
mixed with thought
a dash of inspiration--
thank you God--
i give life
to words
because
they yearn
for freedom
full release
from my head
because
they swirl
in spirals
outward
pressing out
against my skull
moving
to my mouth
and out
or else i keep them
in
and then
they move
to my heart
and strike
a chord
or else i keep them
in
and then
they move
to my fingers
spirals
create
force
of highest energy
it transfers
to the surface
either paper
or the screen
visible
at last
they scream
wanting
to be heard
and
at last
i am relieved
of
beauty.

-d.s.b.
11/13/2013

peaceful ultimatum

the crashing waves
quench my cravings
for a peaceful
ultimatum
to the night.
demanding
i transcribe
the words
come from my head
to the paper
or the screen
take waves
of sound
turned to
satisfying rhythm
through the fingers
i can channel
ocean's
peace.

-d.s.b.
11/12/2013

bird

i dare you to see me
for who i am
believe in me
like a bird on a limb,
who's fragile and lonely,
homeless but free,
making my way
towards the edge
on a whim,
believing i'll fly
one day to the sky,
soaring above
the earth and sea:
making my way
back to my home
joyful and free
like a bird in the sky.

-D.B.
10/25/2013

falling falling falling

a leaf is falling falling falling
falling
for a gentle breeze.
she was falling falling falling
falling
from a rotten tree.
the tree did hate her take her break her
make her
heart feel so unclean.
each branch did hate her take her break her
make her
red so she could bleed.
it thought it had her heart her soul her love
her self
within its reach.
but no her heart her soul her love
her self
then found a way to leave.
so now she's falling falling falling
falling
to a love so sweet;
now she's falling falling falling
falling
love has set her free.

-D.B.
5/3/2012

phoenix.

take me out of my
head
and let me
burn
so i can
breathe
again.
watch me
coming alive
as my demons
burst
to flame
and turn to ash.
now
i fly
like a phoenix
i have new wings
and i'm learning
to soar
again.
from ash
i am
and to ash
i'll go
but for now
i'll live
with a burning
flame.

-D.B.
9/1/2013

my seaglass i'll not find on these sands

my seaglass i'll not find on these sands
just rocks of many hues:
some are bland
some are pretty
but none compare with you.
my seaglass i'll not find on these sands
for mine is a brilliant blue
and though i have found
some red, green and brown,
still none of them are you.
my seaglass i'll not find on these sands
for here is naught but rubble.
the shores from our past
wash away as I walk;
they cannot bring me you.
my seaglass i'll not find on these sands
but behold, far off in the distance,
there's a blue softened shard
the waves of time sculpted
and that one, yes that one, is you.

-D.B.
8/28/2013

7/2013

like a rainstorm
it hits me
in the cold of the night
with a chill wind
this sadness
takes me down
for the count
and my heart
yearns to see you
to hear you
to feel you
my palms feel so lonesome
without your fingers' touch
and your arms
how they surround me
that protection
i do miss
their warmth and silent comfort
lend assurance to my soul
that there's love that can embrace me
as i embrace it back
nothing's quite like your warmth
as it radiates to my chill
when your hands hold mine gently
oh my dear
i miss you still.

-7/2013

7/15-16/2013

if we pretend that shooting stars
are airplanes just for us
do you think they'll let me fly to you
at the speed of light?
you think that if i ask them to
they'll drop from their heavenly homes
and let me ride their glorious tales
in the light of the summer sun?
if i cry sincere enough
perhaps they'll envelope me whole,
comforting me with their glowing warmth
until side by side we stand.

-D.B.
7/15-16/2013

fuel

i feel a power as i write
it fuels me
it is my energy
overcoming all my senses
in the most indescribable way
it courses through my fingertips

love

it fuels my body
i'm suddenly enraptured
by goodness flowing into me
love itself
makes a home in me.

-D.B.
6/2013

5/28/2013

a squeezing

or a crushing

like a wall

or several

pushing upon my heart

crushing it with the weight of 

grief.

compression

strangulation

cut off from my supply of blood

your love 

gone from my presence

too long will it be so.

-D.B.
5/28/2013