little white pill

there's more to me
than that little white pill
there's more to me
than i get from a drug
i am a human
i have a heart
and a brain
and a soul
that is tearing apart.
they tell me i'm destined
to do these great things
they tell me i can do
whatever i dream
but it comes with an asterisk
a bit of fine print:
you can't do it without
that little white pill.
but this is who i am
what i am
how i'm made
are you telling me now
i'm improperly made?
am i defective
will i fail as a human
did God overlook
some careless mistake
that i have to suffer
that's madness i say
that i can't be without
that little white pill.
i'm convinced of my value
with no drugs in my blood
it's not much i'll tell you
so you'd better ask God.
so i guess now i'll ask You
will my purpose still live
if my blood can flow free
from the drugs that they give?
will i choke under pressure
of doing Your will
if i don't choke down
that little white pill?

-D.B.

3/27/2013

used up
and broken
and shattered
alive.
never knowing not to trust.
hiding truth
same excuse
covering up
protecting you and me with lies.
betrayal
injustice
manipulation.
feeling numb, no longer blind.
11/1/2012

Leaves (Part 1)

You held them in your hands,
those leaves,
my trust, my love, my honesty.
"They're fragile things," I said.
"Those leaves,
they tend to tear too easily."
You said to me,
"Those leaves,
they'll be forever in my heart."
And so I let you hold
those leaves,
remember this, our start?
But then you took
those leaves,
And yes, in your heart they went,
but you forgot about
those leaves
And all that they had meant.
I found the first,
my trust,
and you had ripped it all apart,
and then you watched
my trust
in you gradually depart....

-D.B.
4/20-21/2010, 9/26/2012

Leaves (Part 2)

Then when nudged by
my love
you thought it best ignored.
And thus, neglected felt
my love
and that great leaf was torn.
And now you see
my honesty,
but what to do with this?
How to take
my honesty
and crush it in your fist?
You try and try but
my honesty,
resilient in its youth,
can't be but
my honesty
though I left it all to you.
But, my dear, when all
those leaves
of trust and love are gone,
the one that's left,
my honesty,
will not last for too long.
The edges of
my honesty
with time will start to tear,
and then all of
my honesty
will die when I can't care.

-D.B.
4/20-21/2010, 9/26/2012

dear can't you see

dear can't you see where I have brought you to,
the place of beauty's soul?
beyond the shoreline, in the mists,
where lightning rips, where thunder rolls.
dear do you fear for I have shown to you
a dark and empty hole?
it waits for you, you are the key,
you'll bring My light, the light it stole.
dear will you listen to My silence?
it embodies all you know.
when all is calm and storm has left
and you're still here
but not alone.

-D.B.
10/2011

You try so hard to plan your life
then find it's no use planning;
you'll cry yourself a river for
the madness you've been handed.
But everything's a jagged line,
don't try to make it straight,
enjoy the madness of your life,
trust chance, don't hesitate.
Stand passive in this hurricane
and this is what you'll get:
a life of gray and nothingness,
of boredom and regret.

D.B.
6/29/10